This blog is dedicated to my sisters & brothers.
As some of you know, I've hit a speed bump this week. A pulled muscle turned out to be a pinched nerve which turned out to be a herniated disk. All of this went down a week ago and I spent the majority of Monday at Georgetown University Hospital. I found myself speaking to neurosurgeons who used words like MRI and L7 and S1. The only thing I knew was that I was in so much pain from my hip to the middle of my calf that I could no longer stand up straight. I'm not one of those people who ever feels the need to "tough things out" and not take pain killers. I want no part of those accolades on my resume. I prefer the title of "Eager to try to any drug tested by the FDA" in order to get me out of this effin' pain. After all I was just told I was going to be on bed rest for one week. This was very painful for me to hear.
Doctors are interesting people. Every doctor I have ever met has reaffirmed one thing for me...that I'm grateful I did not go into medicine. My neurosurgeon asked the typical questions, age, marital status, do I live alone, etc. etc. When I said I lived alone and that I was single he made this face. It was a face that read, "Oh that sucks for you." I thought to myself, surely I'm not the first single woman who has ever walked, rather hobbled, into his office with a back problem. He asked, "how are you getting home from here?" I told him my plan was to hop into a cab since I that's how I get there. He didn't like that answer, "Is there anyone you can call? A co-worker, a friend?" I said I could call my sister but she lives about an hour away. He advised that I wait for her b/c getting into a cab would worry him. So I call sis, she hops in the car and gets there as fast as she can.
Sometimes it takes a bad situation in order to realize how lucky you are in life. My sister drove through rush hour, picked me up at the hospital, dropped me off at my place and then walked to CVS and waited for my Rx's to get filled. If she didn't pick me up I would have had to walk there myself and most likely would have collapsed on the sidewalk in the middle of Cleveland Park. If any of you know my germ phobia, you can imagine how upset I would be if I had to lay down on a city sidewalk.
I sometimes wonder how people who have no siblings or at least siblings close by, manage to do these things when emergencies arise. I have friends who are the oldest, the youngest, the middle child and some who are only children. I have friends who have parents who moved here from another country and can't speak English and it was up to them to translate on their parent's behalf for things when growing up. I have some friends who moved here from another country and had to learn English just by going to school and basically learning it on their own. These situations amaze me because they really shape the people we turn out to be in life. Some situations make you grow up really fast and think like an adult, some keep you protected and supervised while far removed from the word "responsibility".
Those that were older siblings didn't have anyone to show them the ropes. They just had Mom and Dad telling them right and wrong, but when it came to going to school they were on their own. Take for instance when I went to school I had 4 sisters, 2 brothers and a Mom and a Dad who already knew what was going to happen once I got picked up by that yellow bus. The worry that may have been on my older siblings shoulders didn't really settle on to mine b/c I had them to reassure me of what to expect. And the same holds true for the opposite. When my siblings went off to school I remember being so sad because they were leaving me. There is a picture my Mom took of my sister Gaby's first day at school and I'm standing on the sidewalk crying my eyes out. I thought, why was my best friend getting on this big bus and leaving us? We have Barbies to play with and forts to build, she can't leave me to do all this on my own? I didn't understand but I do remember being very happy when that big bus dropped her off a few short hours later and my Mom and I waited for her outside. I never really had a sibling waiting for me to get home from school since I was the youngest, but I did have my Mom and my dog, Ginger. That was the only welcoming committee I needed and it always made me happy. Nothing beats a wagging tail and a plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies.
I think of all of the lessons I took fore granted growing up because I had so many siblings. My brother Rich taught me how to throw a football, my brother Mike helped me learn to tie my shoes, my sister Marilyn taught me to write the alphabet and read to me everyday. My sisters Bobbe and Donna taught me how to use a curling iron and how to apply eye make-up and my sister Gaby got stuck having to teach me everything else. She was my math tutor, homework corrector, paper editor, direction explainer and constant advice giver from clothes to boys.
I can't imagine being an only child. Who do you go to for help with your homework? Who teaches you how to drive? Who helps you get a fake ID? And who helps you come up with a story so you don't get in trouble with Mom and Dad? Sure there are lots of times when you fight and argue and may wish you were an only child, but those moments are fleeting. Siblings provide that additional framework from the foundation set by our parents. The more siblings you have, the more intricate the framework. I'd like to think that my family has very intricate framework.
No matter what our birth order, we all have skills to share and lessons to learn from our siblings. I'm fortunate that I had 6 to look up to for advice. They probably never realized that all along I was observing them, sharing in their successes and learning from their mistakes. I hope that even though I may be the youngest, I was able to share my strengths and skills and they learned from my experiences, as well.
I guess a week of bed rest can help in more way than one.
